Project FireStarter: Learn to Let Go

Learn to Let Go
Posted by Project FireStarter on May 12, 2013

LEARN TO LET GO by D. B. Mauldin

Last week we talked about learning ‘Self-Love’, and a big part of learning self-love is learning to let go of negative thoughts. We are not talking about controlling our thoughts or suppressing our emotions. We are talking about observation.

The first step is becoming consciously aware of our negative thoughts. Simply acknowledge the negative thought and release it with a breath. The second step is to learn how to ‘not react’ emotionally to the negative thought. This feeds the thought and gives it power. This is what we want to avoid.

We are human and constantly think and feel emotion. This is natural and normal. Through practice, we will come to acknowledge a negative thought, not react to it, but simply release it with a breath. We must save our energy to pour into our positive thoughts.

Recurring negative thoughts are like a song traveling repeatedly, over and over, in our mind. Most of the time, they are unconscious thoughts. It is not hard to acknowledge them once we become aware. The next step is to observe the thoughts without reacting. Once we have become aware, acknowledged, and observed the negative thoughts, then accept it with love.

Forgiving, releasing, and healing are the next steps. We must learn to forgive whatever and/or whoever put these negative thoughts in our head. Forgive ourselves for holding on to these negative thoughts. Release them from our heart with love. Now, we are ready to heal by letting go of our negative thoughts.

In her article, ‘10 Tips to Overcome Negative Thoughts: Positive Thinking Made Easy’, Michelle UY gives us 10 things she did to overcome negative thoughts.

1. Meditate or do yoga.
One of the first things I did was yoga. It took my focus away from my thoughts and brought my attention to my breath. Yoga is also very relaxing which helped ease my mind. Yoga helped me stay present to my experience so instead of jumping to what could happen, it brought me back to the now—the only moment, the most important moment.

2. Smile.
I didn’t do much of this so I literally had to bring myself in front of a mirror and force myself to smile. It really does help change your mood and relieve stress. I also felt lighter because it takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown.

3. Surround yourself with positive people.
I called a friend who I knew could give me constructive, yet loving feedback. When you’re stuck in a negative spiral, talk to people who can put things into perspective and won’t feed your negative thinking.

4. Change the tone of your thoughts from negative to positive.
For example, instead of thinking We are going to have a hard time adjusting to our living situation, replace that with We will face some challenges in our living situation, but we will come up with solutions that we will both be happy with.

5. Don’t play the victim. You create your life—take responsibility.
The way I was thinking and acting, you would think I was stuck. Even if our living situation becomes unbearable, there is always a way out. I will always have the choice to make change happen, if need be.

6. Help someone.
Take the focus away from you and do something nice for another person. I decided to make a tray of food and donate it to the Salvation Army. It took my mind off of things and I felt better for helping someone else.

7. Remember that no one is perfect and let yourself move forward.
It’s easy to dwell on your mistakes. I felt terrible that I acted this way. The only thing I can do now is learn from my mistakes and move forward.

8. Sing.
I don’t remember lyrics very well and it’s probably the reason that I don’t enjoy singing, but every time I do sing I always feel better. When we sing, we show our feelings and this provides an amazing stress relief.

9. List five things that you are grateful for right now.
Being grateful helps appreciate what you already have. Here’s my list: My cats, health, a six-week trip to Asia, a new yoga class that I’ll be teaching, and for my mom’s biopsy coming out clean.

10. Read positive quotes.
I like to place Post-It notes with positive quotes on my computer, fridge door and mirror as reminders to stay positive. Also, I’d like to share with you a quote by an unknown author that was shared in a meditation class that I attended:

Watch your thoughts, they become words.
Watch your words, they become actions.
Watch your actions, they become habits.
Watch your habits, they become your character.
Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.

Happy positive thinking!

Michelle Uy is a Certified Yoga Teacher and Owner of LoveActionYoga. She is Co-Creator of the Eat Well Feel Well Program, a yoga and nutrition program, and she is also certified to teach Yoga Thrive, a therapeutic yoga program for cancer survivors.

Visit: to read more on releasing.

NOTE: Next week we will be moving on to ‘Happiness’.

D. B. Mauldin


Read more Happy Notes at:


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